Stress vs. Anxiety: Signs, Differences, & What to Do
Stress vs. Anxiety: How to Tell the Difference and What to Do About It
Introduction
Everyone feels stressed sometimes — that tight jaw, racing thoughts, or late-night “what if” spirals. But what if the stress doesn’t go away? Many women I work with ask, “Am I just stressed, or is this anxiety?” Understanding the difference matters because it helps you know what kind of support you need — and what tools actually help. Stress and anxiety can feel similar, but they show up differently in the body and mind, and knowing which one you’re dealing with can make a big difference in how you respond.
What Is Stress?
Stress is your body and mind’s response to external pressures — usually temporary challenges that require attention or action.
Examples:
Work deadlines
Parenting hurdles
Life transitions like moving or changing jobs
Typical body and mind signs:
Muscle tension, headaches, or tight shoulders
Irritability or impatience
Trouble sleeping or racing thoughts
Stress can feel intense, but usually it eases once the stressor is gone. It’s your body’s natural alarm system saying, “Hey, pay attention!”
What Is Anxiety?
Anxiety is a bit different. It’s internal and ongoing, often focused on anticipatory “what ifs.” Even when nothing is happening, your body and mind are in overdrive.
Examples:
Worrying about your health or family
Obsessing over future scenarios
Feeling panic or dread over things you can’t control
Typical body and mind signs:
Racing heart, shallow or rapid breathing
Stomach upset, tension, fatigue
Spiraling thoughts, “what if” cycles that won’t stop
Unlike stress, anxiety lingers, sometimes without an obvious trigger, making it feel like your nervous system is permanently stuck in alert mode.
Key Differences
Here’s a quick comparison to make it easier to tell them apart:
Stress:
Triggered by something happening now
Can motivate action
Short-term
Eases when the stressor passes
Focus is on the present
Anxiety:
Usually long-lasting and recurring
May be unclear
Keeps you stuck in “what ifs”
Lingers even when life is calm
Focus is on the future or hypotheticals
Bottom line: Stress is about the present. Anxiety is about the future.
Why It Matters
It might seem subtle, but distinguishing between stress and anxiety matters because the strategies you use to cope are different.
Stress management tools like scheduling, time management, or exercise can help temporarily, but may not fully address anxiety.
Anxiety often keeps you stuck, even when life is calm, and can escalate if left unchecked.
Recognizing anxiety early gives you a chance to address it before it starts affecting sleep, relationships, and overall well-being.
What You Can Do
The good news: whether you’re dealing with stress, anxiety, or a bit of both, there are concrete tools that can help.
1. Grounding and relaxation techniques
Deep breathing or diaphragmatic breath
Body scans to notice tension
Gentle movement like yoga or stretching
2. Healthy boundaries and self-care
Saying no when your plate is full
Scheduling breaks and downtime
Prioritizing activities that restore energy
3. When to seek therapy
If anxiety feels persistent, overwhelming, or disruptive, working with a professional can help. Trauma-informed approaches like EMDR, Brainspotting, yoga therapy, and therapeutic intensives can support your nervous system, release stuck tension, and help you regain clarity and balance.
Even small steps matter. Recognizing the difference between stress and anxiety is the first step toward responding effectively, rather than just “pushing through.”
If you’re wondering whether what you’re carrying is stress or anxiety, you don’t have to figure it out alone. I help women move beyond survival mode into balance and clarity — through therapy and intensives, in-person in Connecticut or online.
